Wicked Games
by Jacksgirl217
Summary: He had known he was in trouble the moment he'd seen Cloud Strife enter his classroom on the second day of term. He was way past the point of small furtive glances and innocent musings about what he might smell like and was progressing towards a full blown obsession which included nightly imaginings of a most erotic kind and daily cold showers.
1. Wicked Games

**A/N: **I'm back and I bring you a little something that came to me whilst browsing tumblr. I swear that sight is a gold mine for nerdy losers like me! Anyways, this is another AU and all will become clear with what I plan to do with it the more chapters I post, so I won't waste anyone's time explaining here. You'll just have to read to find out.

I wanted this to have a heavy American college theme running through it; however I'm more English than Hugh Grant and the Queen put together and have no knowledge of the American education system beyond what I've seen in movies and am therefore, next to useless. However, I shall strive to be as close to the truth as possible and if you read anything that you think is a bit off or you know something that might help me out here, then please give me a shout.

Part two will be up very, very soon. Enjoy. xxx

**Disclaimer: **All characters and places belong to Square Enix and/or Disney. No infringement intended, no profit made. All original lyrics belong to Chris Issak. Version used in this fic has lyrics changed and then performed by James Vincent McMorrow. A Dream Within A Dream written by Edgar Allan Poe. The Last Mohican written by Bernard Malamud.

* * *

'The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.

It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.

I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you.

And I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.

#

And I wanna fall in love

And I wanna fall in love

With you'

* * *

**Wicked Games**

"Yet, if hope has flown away in a night or in a day, in a vision or in none, is it, therefore, the less gone? All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream. I stand amid the roar of a surf-tormented shore, and I hold within my hand…"

Leon watched Cloud Strife's lips move; the lines of poetry falling from between the soft flesh of his mouth and the sound of his velvet voice pulled him sideways and off balance. He always felt off balance around this man. His fingers gripped the edge of his desk a little tighter, his arms locking and his muscles bunched to stop him from sliding from his perch and he waited for the torture to be over.

From five rows back, Cloud gripped the edge of his book and allowed the sharp pain along the inside of his palm to stop him from stumbling. He could feel the warm eyes of his professor on him and could feel his own skin heating. He concentrated on keeping his voice low and smooth and not the faltering tight hitch that wanted to creep out. Once the last line was done he risked a glance up and caught Leon's gaze, direct and intense and burning the way it always was. He felt his cock stir to life.

Leon stood from where he was casually resting against the edge of his desk and his eyes slid away, breaking from the blond's face to wash over the rest of his students that sat waiting for him to speak. The truth was he was having a hard time remembering what the exact point of the exercise had been. Cloud's voice… it had ruined his train of thought.

He was saved from his embarrassment by the clock tower, which peeled out its high and distinctive tone across the campus and made him jump slightly. Absently dismissing his class, a sea of students stirred to life and broke from their rows, a loud chatter rising up from the silence that had followed Cloud's recital.

Leon barely bothered to watch them leave, still too far removed from what he should have been thinking about by the memory of Cloud's lips, that voice, his achingly beautiful eyes that had flicked up only briefly to catch his.

Leon sighed heavily and ran a hand through his long auburn hair and felt the need to loosen the collar of his shirt and tie. It was suddenly far too hot. He busied himself shuffling papers and organising his already immaculate desk while the last of his students filtered out into the halls and he only looked up again once the lone figure, still sat in his seat, slowly rose to his feet.

Leon watched the young man carefully sling his messenger bag over his shoulder, the strap pulling slightly on the collar of his jumper and exposing a tantalising stretch of skin that Leon imagined would taste hot and sweet. He blinked rapidly and wiped at his top lip, discarding the stack of papers in his hand and turned to face Cloud.

The blond man came to a stop in front of his teacher and felt that searing, burning heat radiate from the man the way he always felt it when he got too near. It pulsed and rippled over him like the warmth from a coal fire and he lowered his head to deflect some of the intensity. He raised his hand to pass over the assignment he'd finished and cursed himself when he noticed his hand trembling.

"You finished it?" his professor asked him, surprise clear in his thick voice that was always low and careful and on the cusp of being monotone.

Cloud nodded, swallowing past the dry feeling in the back of his throat. "It was a good assignment." he replied his heart fluttering a fraction faster as Leon took the papers from him.

Was he imaging this between them? Was he the only one that felt this ridiculous gravity? The older man had always seemed so unaffected; Cloud couldn't tell if he actually felt anything at all. Most of the time he looked utterly bored. There was nothing the blond wanted more than to see some semblance of emotion on his handsome professors face, and if he could be the cause of that, then all the better. Cloud allowed himself a few seconds to ponder all the ways he might get the older man to react to him.

"You enjoyed it?"

Cloud had to kick start his brain and reel back, his mind momentarily lost in the gutter of his most explicit thoughts before he remembered his professor was talking about the assignment.

"Yeah, Malamud was cool. Uh, though I thought it was gonna be about actual Mohicans. You know, like the Daniel Day Lewis film. Turns out it's really, really not." Cloud replied, trying to be glib but inwardly cringing. His efforts to appear funny in front of his professor where wasted however, as Leon turned without a second glance and placed his work on his desk. Cloud could have disappeared into a hole in the ground right then and there and felt the familiar rising of a flush cascade over his face.

"I look forward to reading it." the older man said in an almost bored tone that made Cloud's stomach twist in mortification. He nodded his head and turned to leave, sure that he could feel the burning eyes of his teacher searing into his back.

Leon watched him go, his gaze sequestered and surreptitious behind his curtain of hair and he let his eyes drop to Cloud's ass. Feeling a flush rise up he busied himself with the papers on his desk, which still didn't need any more organising than they had done a few minutes ago. He sat himself heavily in his chair and breathed out a deep sigh.

He had known he was in trouble the moment he'd seen Cloud Strife enter his classroom the second day of term and his small infatuation hadn't gotten any easier as the days and weeks had passed. If anything it had only grown stronger. He was way past the point of small furtive glances and innocent musings about what he might smell like and was progressing towards a full blown obsession which included nightly imaginings of a most erotic kind and daily cold showers.

Leon grit his teeth and mentally slapped himself. This was pathetic he scolded. He was a twenty nine year old man and a college professor and he would not become the victim of some obscene school girl infatuation, especially not with one of his students. He was stronger than that! However, he feared it may have already been far too late for the pep talk when he caught himself gently rubbing his thumb up and down the edge of the paper the young blond man had just given him, almost caressing it.

"Holy Hyne." He groaned to himself, bunching his hands up in his hair.

This was going to be a long semester.


	2. The Rules

**A/N: **Big thank yous to E. Rayne and WindWisp for pointing out my whoopsie with the bell in the last chapter. It has now been corrected.

I've got a bunch of these written already and plan to keep updating until my muse runs out. I don't know whether there will be any specific plot other than the obvious, but if one comes to me I'll try and work it in. For now, you can pretty much just consider this a good old PWP.

* * *

**The Rules**

Leon had no idea how Cloud could sleep through the noise that drifted up through the floor from the bar beneath them and he turned on his side, propping himself up onto his elbow to lean down, pressing a kiss to a chilly shoulder and pulled the blankets up a little higher.

He thought about getting up to shut the window that his younger lover always insisted on keeping open but decided against it and instead allowed himself a small tender act. Cloud was still asleep and wouldn't notice how the older man curled himself around his slim body, tucking his arm around his waist and nuzzling into the back of Cloud's neck to place another kiss to the warm skin there.

He inhaled deeply, savouring the unique scent that reminded him of warm cotton and a faint spicy cologne that Leon still didn't know the name of, but which Cloud always wore.

A loud barrel of laughter floated up from the street below and made Leon wonder once again how Cloud could possibly still be asleep. He supposed the younger man was used to it however. His apartment above his friends bar was somewhat removed from Leon's own lodgings at the University and the most he had ever had to put up with was a few drunken frat parties spilling out onto college grounds every now and again.

He curled himself a little tighter around the smaller body, resting his head into the crook of his own arm and tried to ignore the churning knot of unease in his gut. Even thought this was far from the first time he'd found himself in bed with his young student he still fought with the guilt. Trying to stay away from Cloud however, had proven to be more of a challenge than he'd anticipated.

As if sensing that he was being thought of, the young man stirred.

Leon felt him curl his leg around his own, Cloud's hand coming to rest on top Leon's, which was pressed lightly against Cloud's stomach and he squeezed Leon's fingers ever so slightly, acknowledging him.

It was too late for the older man to pull away and pretend that he hadn't been cuddling. He tried to settle his fluttering heart and calm his panic as he felt the younger man shift a little closer to him, his buttocks brushing dangerously close to Leon's crotch.

Despite his anguish and guilt, Leon felt himself stir to life.

"Trouble sleeping?" he heard Cloud say. The hand that was covering his own pressed his fingers to Cloud's belly and Leon had to work quickly to clear his throat of the small moan before he answered.

"Are they queuing up for the end of the world down there?"

Cloud chuckled and shifted closer, his body finally pressed flush against Leon's front and he turned his head, his nose now only inches from the older man's.

"You get used to it." he murmured.

Leon swallowed thickly, unable to tear his gaze away from Cloud's eyes that had always held him captive despite how much he'd fought against them. He was seized – immobile and breathless – by them, his whole body tense and rigid and his gut still churned in slow circles; his mind telling him he shouldn't be here, he shouldn't be doing this. Cloud was his student – his responsibility - he'd been entrusted with the man's mind; his body hadn't been part of the deal.

Cloud let go of his hand and reached up, threading his fingers into Leon's hair and pulled him down the slight distance to meet his lips, kissing him hard. Leon wasn't sure whether he'd done it on purpose, but it had done the job of obliterating those nagging feelings of guilt. The way the younger man was slowly grinding his backside into his crotch was only helping matters.

His hand that had been pressed to the taught stomach of his young lover moved lower and grasped at Cloud's straining erection, the blond's moan caught in Leon's mouth.

Cloud's hand clenched in the brunet's hair and he pulled away from the older man's mouth, pressing his forehead to Leon's and panted softly.

"You drive me crazy, you know that?" Leon murmured against Cloud's flushed skin, biting back the moan that threatened to come spilling out the more Cloud worked his ass against his cock, rolling his hips in time with Leon's slow strokes. He missed the small satisfied smirk that fluttered over Cloud's lips.

The younger man let out soft little moans and breathy sighs making Leon suspect Cloud knew exactly what he was doing. He was pushing all of Leon's buttons and the older man had no desire to hold himself back any longer. He rolled Cloud onto his front, hardly wasting a second as he fucked him into the mattress, the laughter and music from the bar downstairs coving up their cries of release when they came hard for a second time that night.

Once silence had descended on the streets, the bars and clubs shut up for the night Leon extracted himself from the tangle of Cloud's limbs and got out of bed. The chilly night air hit him through the open window and he dressed quickly, lamenting the fact that he would have to go back to his own empty dorm room and then immediately erased that thought before it could take root and grow. It had been their only real official rule – apart from their silent and obvious agreement that no one could know. They had both agreed that spending the night was probably a step too close to an actual relationship. Something that this most definitely wasn't; whatever _this_ was.

Before leaving he turned to Cloud sat up in the rumpled bed, blankets pooled around his waist and Leon's mouth went dry. Why was he leaving again?

"Tomorrow night?" he asked, hoping he didn't sound as desperate as he felt.

Cloud nodded, his blond bangs silvery in the pale moonlight bounced and swayed across his face, cutting shadows across his flawless skin.

"Tomorrow." Cloud confirmed, his eyes burning.

Leon licked his lips and allowed himself to forget just for a second as he bent and placed a kiss to Cloud's mouth, cupping his cheek as he did.

Cloud would deny that he'd turned his face up to the older man.

Shrugging on his leather jacket, Leon slipped out of the drayman's door and emerged from the alley that ran along the side of Seventh Heaven. With one last glance up at the open window above the bar he climbed into his car and set off back to HBU.


	3. The Stakes

**The Stakes**

The moment Cloud enters Leon's office, casually locking the door behind him and pulling the blind down over the frosted glass and the sign that reads 'Head Of Department' in one smooth movement, the older man knows exactly what he wants. He discards the papers he has been marking and leans back in his swivel chair, watching with large eyes as Cloud drops his bag by his feet. The look on the younger man's face has already caused his throat to dry out and his pants to suddenly become uncomfortably tight.

Only a few short paces and Cloud is in front of Leon, his feet gently nudging Leon's legs apart, those eyes still burning intensely into Leon's who can only stare helplessly back at him.

He watches Cloud sink to his knees; those warm hands running up Leon's thighs, pinching slightly at the top and he blushes uncontrollably when he notices Cloud's gaze flick to his lips, the young man's tongue slipping out to wet his own mouth as if hungry.

"Cloud, what are you…" his question trails off even though he knows perfectly well what Cloud is doing. His breathing hitches and he moans as the young man palms him softly through his trousers.

"Do you want me to stop?"

Leon's silence gives Cloud his answer, that small smirk ghosting his lips as he shuffles a little closer, widening Leon's legs with his elbows.

"I haven't seen you all week." Cloud comments, sliding his finger into the top of Leon's zipper and wiggles it down an inch, his thumb running over the button, teasingly.

Leon doesn't have a good enough excuse and so remains quiet, his careful, considerate gaze resting on the young man's features, his light blush the only give away that Cloud is affecting him at all. Well, that and his aching arousal. He lifts a hand and places it to the side of Cloud's face, his own thumb running circles against the soft skin there and he thinks he could get used to the feeling. It's velvety like peach skin and the fire that sparks in those blue/green eyes makes his stomach flip.

The silence drags on as Cloud releases the zipper and button on Leon's trousers, steady breaths growing heavy as Cloud reaches inside and Leon has to call upon all of his experience and stamina not to just buckle and come right there and then. He watches that hot mouth descend on him, sucking in a sibilant hiss through clenched teeth when those moist lips close around his length and Cloud begins to suck lightly.

He's amazed that he can relax enough to feel this turned on, considering where they are but all he can think about is that hot mouth and how it works him faster, a wet tongue teasing his head. His left hand slides up from Cloud's cheek to tangle in his hair and his right hand grips the edge of his desk, fingernails digging into the wood.

"Cloud!" He's not ashamed to say he's close. It's been a week after all and Cloud is _so_ good with that mouth. He feels the young man grip him harder at the base of his cock and just as unexpectedly as his visit is, Cloud takes him in further, swallowing around him and Leon shudders so hard he grips at Cloud's hair and is sure that he's pulled some of it out.

"Fuck." He exclaims as quietly as he can, aware that Cid's office is only next door and it's only wood and glass that separate him from the busy corridor outside.

Suddenly Leon is overcome with the desire to throw Cloud across his desk and fuck him until they are both too sated to move, but he restrains himself, heat rising from his very centre as his balls draw up towards him and he grips Cloud's hair tighter.

"Fuck, Cloud… I'm coming." He pants, wanting to give his younger lover enough warning to pull away if he wants, but the blond just carries on and Leon has to screw his eyes shut at how fucking hot that is.

He opens his mouth in a silent moan and jerks and shudders his way through his orgasm. Once the last of his trembling aftershocks ripples through him he lets out a hoarse pant, aware that his hand is flexing and twisting still in Cloud's silky blond hair.

The young man has pulled back as far as he can and is grinning up at him, the shine of his professor's seed still glistening on his lips and with a quick wipe of the back of his hand, it's gone.

Leon lets him go and Cloud stands, bracing himself on Leon's knees he bends forward and places a light kiss to Leon's open mouth.

"You can repay the favour tonight. My place, 9:30." And he stands up straight, turning towards the door and throws a smirk over his shoulder as he watches Leon tuck himself back in and straighten his clothes out.

Five seconds later, Cloud has retrieved his bag from where he left it by the door and is walking out of Leon's office, re-joining the throng of students that pass like a current through the halls.


	4. False Starts

**False Starts**

Leon picked his way through the mess of drunken students and tried his best to ignore the fact that most of them were underage. It was hard for him, being the stickler for the rules that he was, but he wasn't here for that – not in that capacity at least – and he continued scanning the room for his true reason for turning up tonight.

He found him sat on the bottom of a flight of stairs that lead up to the toilets, talking with a pretty brunette girl, hand curled round a bottle of beer and his cheeks ruddy from alcohol. His expression was light and full of laughter as he and the girl shared a private joke and bowed their heads conspiratorially.

Leon's heart hammered painfully in his chest a few times before he managed to school himself and settled his normally taciturn frown back in place. He approached the blond, clearing his throat which could only just be heard over the music and the shouts of everyone having a good time. It had been such a long time since Leon had set foot in a bar, let alone one full of students.

Cloud glanced up at him and had to do a double take, standing abruptly he caught his beer as it nearly slipped free; rubbing the palm of his hand against his thigh to remove the foaming residue before sticking it out awkwardly in an offer of a handshake that wasn't really necessary.

"Professor!" he exclaimed, and Leon wasn't sure whether Cloud was uncomfortable at being approached by his teacher or being caught drinking. (Even though he was twenty two and quite within his rights to drink whatever the hell he wanted.) "I didn't think you'd come." Cloud confessed sounding pleased, slurring his speech slightly and Leon thought it had more to do with drink than nervousness, though he couldn't be sure.

"You convinced me." Leon said simply, taking Cloud's hand and even though it was cold and a little wet from the beer bottle he still felt that spark and tug – the one that he couldn't explain or pull away from – ignite in his skin and draw him a little closer than was normal.

They held each other's stare for a heartbeat too long and the air become uncomfortable, the pretty brunette clearing her throat to end the awkward connection.

"Uh, Professor, this is Aerith. She's a Phycology major." Cloud introduced his friend, pulling his hand out of Leon's grasp. The older man immediately regretted the loss.

The woman smiled politely and extended her hand and it was only then that Leon cut his eyes away from the blond, accepting her introduction and reminded himself that he was supposed to be engaging in conversation, because, well, this was a party.

"A pleasure to meet you. You must be studying with Kramer." He said rather stiffly, aware that his more than rusty social skills were getting ridiculously out of hand.

"That's right. She's amazing, do you know her?"

The question was meant as a conversation starter but after a few more faltering words, Leon dried up. For a man who had majored in English, and now taught it, the brunet was as ineloquent as they came. He was saved from death-by-awkward-silence when Aerith excused herself and it was just himself and Cloud; once again that curious and disorientating pull enshrouding them and somehow making their long silences more bearable.

"Would you like a drink?" Cloud offered at last.

Leon was about to decline when he considered where they were and thought better of it. He knew perfectly well he was odd enough without adding to it.

"Umm, sure." He replied, following Cloud to the bar. "Just a beer thanks." He added thinking of his car parked outside.

When the blond ordered two beers and collected them without paying, Leon lifted an eyebrow.

"Shouldn't you pay for those?" he asked, worried.

"Huh?" Cloud asked him clearly confused, making Leon confused, which in turn made his cheeks heat from embarrassment and then his thudding heart turn sharp with anger. He knew he was making a fool of himself somehow.

"The beers, I mean. You didn't pay for them." The awkward and stupid question hung between them and all Leon wanted to do was stuff the stupid words back into his mouth and pretend like he had never even bothered trying to make conversation.

Seconds later Cloud's face cleared and he smiled; a cute crooked turning of his lips and for some reason it only embarrassed Leon more.

"Nah, it's cool. My friend owns this bar. I have a tab." He explained handing Leon his beer, that wry little smile still tugging at the corner of his mouth like he knew exactly how much Leon was dying inside.

The older man just nodded his head and wisely decided to shut the hell up. He followed the blond through the push and shove of the crowd until they were secreted away in an alcove behind the flight of stairs, a rickety table propped up with beer mats between them.

"I'm really pleased you came tonight." Cloud said.

The words made Leon's chest tighten and his skin flush. He hoped it wasn't noticeable in the dim light and he swallowed thickly, nodding his head curtly. He knew he should say something back, it was his turn to speak after all but he found his tongue was stuck to the roof of his mouth. It was thick and rubbery and he couldn't make it work the way he wanted it to so he took a quick swig of his beer and hoped it would do the trick.

He found that talking with Cloud required many beers and after a few hours - which he was surprised to find had passed by in what felt like seconds - he realised he was quite drunk and their conversation had become easier.

He could feel his heated cheeks and the light buzz in his skull, and worst of all a faint giddy feeling rising in his chest when he realised that he and Cloud had been talking animatedly for nearly the entire time. The conversation came to a natural lull and he took a moment to consider in amazement at how smart Cloud was. Leon couldn't remember the last time he'd had such an interesting conversation with someone who actually knew what the fuck they were on about. He registered that coiling, flipping, gurgling feeling in his stomach and he knew then, without a shadow of a doubt that he was hooked - line and sinker.

It was only the beer that was stopping him from actually freaking out about that fact.

Leon could tell he wasn't the only one surprised to find out he actually had a sense of humour buried under all of his dark looks and frosty edges. It had been such a long time since anything had made him laugh that he'd almost forgotten how to do it. But the way Cloud talked, his humour so dry and witty, he couldn't help the chuckle of laughter that rose from him like champagne bubbles, making his shoulders shake and his face hurt from smiling so much.

The way Cloud had looked at him the first time he cracked a smile - the first time that throaty little chuckle rose above the din of the bar - made that warm glow in the centre of Leon's chest burst outwards and heat the rest of him. He'd never been looked at like that before. Ever.

"So you live here?" He asked gesturing around the bar and noticing the thinning crowd which had dwindled considerably.

"Yeah, I have an apartment up on the third floor. It's not much but Tifa lets me have it for next to nothing which is handy considering I'm broke now I'm back in school."

"Why'd you drop out in the first place?" Leon only briefly registered that it was kind of a blunt question before he watched Cloud's face fall slightly. The blond ducked his head and began picking at the label stuck to his beer.

"My mom passed away. I had to go home to take care of things. I guess… I just had to get my head right before I came back." He replied, trying his best to keep the conversation light.

"Was there no one else that could have taken care of it for you?"

When Cloud looked at him like he'd grown a second head, Leon began to think that maybe the lack of a maternal figure in his own life had affected him more than he had realised.

"No. I'm an only child and I've no idea where my dad is." The blond replied rather curtly.

And just like that, all of those warm feelings that had been causing Leon's head to spin disappeared and he was left feeling heated by mortification instead. He had clearly struck a chord somewhere and not for the first time Leon cursed his own social ineptness for not realising what he'd done.

Silence descended between them and it sat awkwardly and obvious, making the seconds feel like they were crawling by.

Once again, Leon was saved from his own tactlessness by Cloud, who cleared his throat, straightened his shoulders and seemed to brush the incident off like nothing had happened.

"I gotta say though, I'm kinda enjoying it better now. Taking that time out to think about what I wanted to do really helped. I never would have picked your class if I hadn't." He said with a bright smile which made Leon feel all the more guilty. He found himself smiling back affectionately.

"You seem to know your stuff without my help." Leon commented, honestly meaning every word. He was starting to wonder what it was he could possibly teach this kid.

"I read a lot." Cloud offered by way of explanation and Leon figured as much. "You should see my apartment; you can't see the floor for half the crap I've got up there."

"I'd like to see that." Leon said the words before he'd even realised he'd thought them in his head; his unconscious desire to see where Cloud ate and slept obviously brought to the fore by his drink addled mind and lack of a brain filter. Cloud's bright red face would have been comical, had Leon been in a position to appreciate it.

"You... You want to see my apartment?"

And well, Leon was invested now. He'd said the words and he had made such a fool of himself already this evening he couldn't bring himself to try and clumsily dig himself out of another proverbial hole so he nodded awkwardly, like he'd meant to say it all along and hoped to Hyne that the young blond man wouldn't see through his pathetic bluff.

"Sure, uh... Okay. I guess, umm. Would you... How bout now?" Cloud's stumbling words came stuttering out, the air between them suddenly tense with unnameable friction and Leon had to try and swallow round his suddenly too dry throat that no amount of beers would be able to quench.

"Sure." He managed to squeak out. He had to hand it to himself, he was impressed he'd managed that much.

And it was how he found himself slipping past the bar and into the service alley, following his young student on shaky drunken legs through the drayman's door and up a flight of wooden stairs that passed the first floor landing, and then continued on up into an open plan apartment. There was no front door to Cloud's home, only an intercom and the large open staircase that swirled all the way to the bottom which made Leon feel dizzy when he looked down.

The apartment itself was large and lofty. A kitchen area, a bed, a desk and a bookshelf the only pieces of large furniture in the room with what looked like a bathroom over in the far corner. Three large sash windows would bathe the room in sunlight during the summer and one of them stood open, letting in the frosty November chill.

Now, with the noise and cover of the bar far below them, a ringing silence seemed to peel between them that was deafening for the absence of sound.

Leon watched Cloud move off into his apartment, flicking on lamps and shuffling books and papers here and there, none of it actually helping the fact that it really was kind of a mess.

"It's nothing great. It's kinda weird that the kitchens just over there from the bed and there's no sofa, but it's alright I guess. I get by." Cloud tried to fill the temporary lull with his light chatter, scratching the back of his head as he turned about his apartment and all Leon could think was that he was actually in Cloud's _home_.

He was on the brink of stepping over some line he hadn't even realised he'd approached but there he was, charging towards it at speed and he had no idea how to stop. He figured he was already way past the point of no return any way. He was in over his head and none of this was appropriate but for some reason he couldn't make his feet move or his mouth work. He knew he needed to leave, but he didn't want to and for the first time in his professional career - for the first time in his entire life - he was going against his better judgment.

"It's nice. I like that it's different." He commented walking over to the bookshelf and browsed the collection. "You have a first addition Charles Dickens." Leon said, more than a little impressed. He picked the book up and reverently held it in his hands, turning it this way and that to allow the faded gilt lettering on the cover to catch in the vapid light. He felt Cloud come to stand by his side and he had to suppress a shiver.

"Yeah, Great Expectations. It belonged to my mom's mom's mom or something like that. To be honest, it wasn't all I hoped it would be."

Leon's puzzlement and confused frown dissolved a moment later as he looked up and caught sight of Cloud's cheesy grin, that stiff and ominous tension melting away as they both fell into easy laughter at the terrible pun. It fizzled and petered out until once again there was nothing but a long and intense silence and a look that should have ended long ago.

Cloud was the first to lean in, Leon had been sure of it. There had been space and air and tension crackling between them and then all of a sudden there was nothing; the distance between them eaten up as Leon's arms and mouth were all at once full of Cloud.

He felt fingers in his hair, tugging and pulling and a sharp jabbing pain in his back as he was pushed up against the bookshelf and he had to breathe in sharply through his nose because no matter how much he badly needed air right then, there was no way he wanted to stop kissing Cloud.

The first edition had fallen from his hands and landed on the floor somewhere forgotten as his fingers clenched in Cloud's sweater, pulling and tugging at the material and the younger man nudged himself closer, one knee nudging against Leon's to coax his legs open slightly.

The older man hissed and tried to catch the moan that slipped out when Cloud brought their hips together, grinding himself against the slightly taller man as his hands left the brunet's hair and slid downwards, wrapping themselves in the lapels of Leon's leather coat. He tugged hard, pressing himself against the taller man and Leon moaned again.

There was a part of his brain that, on some level, was still functioning, but right then all Leon cared about was Cloud Strife and getting more of him.

He pushed off the bookcase, hands still digging hard into Cloud's hips as he guided him backwards, feet stumbling over half empty boxes and piles of books until they made it to the bed; falling backwards in an inelegant tangle of limbs and fierce kisses. They bounced, the old metal bed frame screeching and rattling under their combined weight, allowing Leon to grind his hips in a better angle, unsure whether the moan that sounded as a result came from himself or the younger man.

"Leon."

The sound of his given name moaned so sensually over his lips caused such a headlong collision with reality it was almost like a physical blow. He had heard his name before of course, but from this man - from _this_ man - who was supposed to be his student and who had only ever referred to him as his professor, it was the proverbial bucket of cold water that woke the older man from his lust induced sleepwalk. He pulled away, his shoulders suddenly tense and his stomach rolling and protesting.

What was he doing?!

Cloud stared up at him with kiss bruised lips and questioning eyes, his face open and honest and so full of want that Leon couldn't help the heady mix of lust and shame and guilt that flooded him all at once.

He shouldn't be here. He shouldn't be doing this.

"Leon, what's wrong?"

And there is was again, that slap to his face that brought him even further out of his stupor.

He'd kissed his student. He'd been prepared to go a whole lot further. Hell, he still _wanted_ to go a whole lot further even despite his abrupt wake up call. That was the thought that frightened him the most. His disregard for even the most basic of ethics - his own morals - sickened him. Hadn't he always thought he was better than that?

"I... I can't do this." He murmured eyes wide with shock and realisation, the buzz of the drink long gone and replaced with a cold and unfeeling reality.

He had to get out of there.

"I'm sorry." He breathed, pulling away abruptly to stand on hollow legs. He really was. He was sorrier than Cloud would ever know and for more than just taking advantage of his position of power.

"Leon, it's alright." Cloud said, sitting up and reaching out to him.

Leon knew better. He shook his head and turned, needing to be out of there as quickly as possible.

Ignoring Cloud's shouts of protest, Leon fled. He raced down the curling staircase and pushed on the metal bar across the heavy side door, stumbling slightly out into the alleyway. He breathed in the frigid night air and let it sober him, fully aware that he was probably in no fit state to drive but uncaring as he approached his car and unlocked it. He wasted no time in turning the ignition and speeding off back to campus as fast as he could.


	5. Subterfuge

**A/N:** Well hello again, and what a Christmas it's been. Absolutely NOTHING went as planned! Only work, which was as reliably busy and shite as it always is this time of year, went as expected. Never the less, I managed to find time to write this. I hope you enjoy. x

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**Subterfuge**

"Slowly."

Leon's smooth and velvety voice comes out of the darkness and even though the command is only barely uttered it is deafening in the black stillness of the classroom.

Vast empty space cut through with inky darkness surround the two figures: one, lent up against the frame of the door, the other sat in his seat five rows back. He can't see the man stood by the door for the thick veil of night but he knows he's there. He can feel those eyes on him. He knows the weight of those eyes anywhere and he can feel them now, pressed against his skin as he slowly strokes himself, obeying the older man's command to go slow and make it last.

Cloud doesn't know how Leon got the key. He knows they're not meant to be in here so late, long after the university has closed for the night and every student and teacher gone home and he doesn't know what their excuse will be if they're caught.

The thought sends a thrill trough him and he bites his lip.

He's panting lightly and it's making his throat a little dry. He swallows to ease it and tries to fight the urge to cover up – the feeling of exposure. He's sat amongst the empty seats where his fellow classmates would sit during the daylight hours and he feels like he's on a stage; the tepid light cast from the lone street lamp lighting up the courtyard outside is his spotlight and it's casting a weak and insipid orange light cut through with elongated shadows, hiding just enough of what he's doing to tease his watcher.

The shadows move and gradually blocks of light fall over the tall figure of his teacher as Leon moves into the centre of the empty classroom. His light footsteps echo loudly in the quiet and only the soft hush of panted breaths fill the void between them. The older man leans against his desk, arms folded and watches. The dusky shadows fall across his face and hide his gentle smile, only the glint of his eye showing and Cloud's breath catches, his hand falters and he has to swallow hard.

"Don't stop." The command is simple and powerful and Cloud begins again, his rhythm slow and sure. He licks his lips and spreads his legs a little wider.

After a few more minutes of painful teasing the older man straightens and drops his hands to his sides, his face once again hidden in the shifting blackness.

"Come here."

Cloud is startled for a moment and he hesitates to leave the safety of the shadows but the heavy silence and the dark eyes he knows are watching him force his limbs to move. He gets to his feet and on shaking legs that are made weak with desire and pleasure he makes his way down the steps and up to the front of the class, stopping short in front of the desk his teacher is standing beside. He can see Leon clearly now, the veil of night no longer separating them and he can feel his cheeks burn with the intensity of the older man's stare. He's still touching himself – Leon never told him to stop – and the heat that rushes to his cheeks burns like a fire when he sees Leon's eyes slide downwards and rest on his ministrations.

Leon walks around the younger man, his careful eyes sliding along the planes and shadows of the blond's still clothed body until he is pressed up lightly against his back; breath ghosting ever so slightly on a pale neck, making the soft blond hairs stand on end. He reaches out and places his hands on Cloud's hips, tugging the material out of Cloud's grip and pulls downwards with one swift yank. The jeans drop to the floor and he can feel Cloud stiffen and shiver.

"Place your hands on the desk." He says his voice a soft murmur and so dark and sinful Cloud has to stifle a moan of anticipation.

The blond has to lean forward slightly but he does as he's told and places his hands flat on the wood of the desk, his thumbs curling under the edge for grip. He feels Leon's hands on his skin, caressing the flesh of his buttocks and his knees shake. He doesn't know whether he'll be able to keep standing through what he knows is to come and his soft shuddering breaths pick up.

Leon's thumb moves closer to Cloud's entrance and the younger can't supress a small whine, his head bowed low and hanging between his shoulders, he winces slightly as Leon grabs the flesh of his ass cheek and pinches hard – a warning to stay quiet. Cloud lets out a small cry and tries to push back against Leon's body, already too worked up to wait much longer and he hears Leon's soft chuckle. The older man is teasing him and Cloud's pulse doubles – he can feel it in his neck, pounding softly under his skin, the steady tattoo of his heart fluttering against his ribcage and it makes him dizzy for a moment.

He hears the muted ruffle of cloth and a zipper, Leon's hands only alighting on him briefly, his fingertips slightly chilly in the draughty room, before they are gone again. He hears a foil wrapper and moments later the squeeze of a tube being emptied and for some reason it makes his stomach ache with need and his sex rise, the muscles in his legs twitch.

After long slow torturous seconds Leon's thumb is back, without warning probing gently at his entrance and Cloud's knees buckle slightly. He spreads his legs as far as his jeans will allow and lowers himself to his elbows. He wants Leon to just get on with it and he knows Leon knows this too. They've been fucking long enough now to pick up on each other's little tells and signs so Cloud knows Leon is holding off on purpose, his slicked up digit hardly moving as Cloud wiggles back ever so slightly to try and get that friction he so badly needs.

"Where do you want me?" he hears Leon ask. He can feel the man's thumb working in and out ever so slowly and Cloud lets out a low and dangerous moan, his head hung low.

"Inside me. Now." He demands in a soft growl, pushing back for good measure only to have Leon pull away.

The older man removes his thumb and runs the pad of it around Cloud's entrance, tracing the line of that hidden patch of skin until he's cupping Cloud's balls.

"Once I'm inside you, how do you want me to fuck you?" Leon asks and Cloud's breath is expelled from his lungs in a long low whoosh. His body is set aflame by the older man and he can hardly bring himself to answer him.

"Hard." He croaks out, amazed that a man of so few words could speak some of the most erotic.

Leon's hands leave him and come to rest on his hips, a light and subtle grip against his skin and Cloud bucks only slightly when he feels that large blunt heat against his entrance.

With one smooth jab of his hips, Leon is inside Cloud and the younger lets out a short cry, his fists clenching. Leon shudders out a heavy breath, steady and hot through his nose as his eyes slide closed and he lets himself fall into the sensations of being inside his lover. Even now, only buried at the tip he feels his body set alight with the squeezing numbing pleasure. He works a hand up Cloud's back, soothing the tight muscles with soft little circle motions. After a few minutes standing on the brink if pleasure, he hears the sigh that lets him know it's okay to move and he gradually pushes in to the hilt.

A long moan and a gentle curse break the silence and Leon can feel Cloud's legs shaking, can feel the younger's whole body trembling as he pulls out and then glides back in making the blond jolt slightly.

The tight velvet heat of the young man pulls Leon off balance and he has to open his eyes and focus on a spot on the back wall and he knows. He knows that every time he's in this classroom, every time he teaches and looks up to see this blond man staring back at him from his seat amongst his students, he'll think of this moment. He'll think of dark shadows and the heady musk of arousal and he'll think of fucking the man over his desk. The knowledge makes him shudder and let out a throaty little moan and with renewed passion he grips Cloud's slight hips and fucks him harder.

Cloud lets out a startled cry and the desk squeaks as it's nudged slightly across the lino, the younger man struggling to find purchase and keep his balance as he gets what he asked for.

Leon is fucking him hard and he's not even touched his dick yet but he's already so close to cuming. He yelps a startled shout and collapses against the surface of the desk, his chest pressed to the wood as Leon finds that spot inside him. Those long hard thrusts are replaced with short quick strikes and Cloud can't hold back the string of 'oh fuck's that spill from his lips with every inward stroke.

A bead of sweat tickles his ear as it slides from his hair line and down across the swell of his top lip. His eyes are screwed shut and his teeth ground down together in an attempt to hold back the tidal shouts but still, harsh panting and wanton moans slip out.

"Nng, close." He manages to whine, his nails scraping against the cheap wood of the desk.

Leon slams himself in flush against Cloud's backside and reaches around, grasping Cloud's neglected erection and squeezes him, twisting his hips as he does and makes Cloud moan so loudly, he fears maybe the janitor will hear them after all.

"Hold on." The older man demands, squeezing tighter still and he begins to move his hips in a fast and frantic motion, his whole body snapping forward as he drives himself into Cloud again and again, rocking the younger body underneath him with such force the desk is creeping forwards inch by inch.

"Oh fuck, Leon… Can't" Cloud manages to cry out before he feels the pressure around his cock go slack and the older man's hand begins to move.

The sensation of Leon's hand coupled with his brutal thrusting spills Cloud over the edge and he cums in shuddering explosive ripples, the walls of his ass tightening and contracting around the older man who gives one more hard shove and lets out a hoarse 'fuck,' spilling himself and filling the condom in warm pulsing waves.

Cloud collapses in an exhausted heap, knelt on bare knees in front of the skewed desk, his forehead pressed to the lip of it as he gasps in lungful after lungful of air like a starving fish, his jeans still tangled around his feet. Leon staggers back to admire his work.

After a few moments, once Leon has righted himself and disposed of the condom, his jeans are back in place and his erratic breaths have returned to normal he bends down and heaves Cloud to his feet; his large hands steady under Cloud's arms as the younger man wobbles and clutches tightly to Leon's sweater. Once the older man is sure Cloud can stand on his own he bends to pick the blond's jeans up from around his feet and raises them up the younger man's shaking legs. Carefully he dresses him, belting the trousers back into place and pulling and plucking at the edges of Cloud's jumper, picking bits of imaginary lint off the material as finally they come to stand face to face, cheeks flushed with their exertion and eyes ablaze with the thrill of their coupling.

Leon smiles ever so faintly, the subtle curve of his lip just a barest hint of affection in the darkness of the classroom and if it's at all possible, Cloud feels his skin flush even hotter. He is exhausted and shattered, but the sight of that smile sends sparks of lust and something else through him all over again and he stamps them out as if that thought were on fire. He can't allow those feelings to surface.

Cloud almost recoils as Leon lifts a hand to cup his face, but he relaxes into the kiss the older man gives him and tells himself not to worry – this isn't getting that serious.

"Come on." Leon instructs him, letting his hand fall away from Cloud's cheek to slip into the younger man's hand. He tugs him lightly towards the door and Cloud tells himself to snap out of that ridiculous trance he knows he's fallen into. It's Leon's eyes – they do it to him every time. "Let's get out of here."

And Cloud follows him, back out into the deserted corridor, locking the door behind them. They sneak back out of the English department, hugging the line of shadows as they cross the courtyard and tiptoe back to the halls of residence. Their subterfuge only reignites their lust and by the time they are back outside of Leon's dormitory, the older man checking quickly both ways before they slip inside, they are once again tangled together. All lips and teeth, stifled moans because this time someone really might hear them and short sharp thrusts of want and need. They pass away the night, only falling asleep briefly before the first rays of dawn creep in as surely as they shadows did the night before.

Cloud dresses quickly and listens intently at the door for any sound. It's the weekend and he doesn't think anyone will be up this early, so with one final glance back at his professor sat tangled up in white sheets and mussed up hair, he leaves. The soft click of the door behind him is the only sound in the quiet stillness of pre-dawn.


	6. The Chase

**A/N: **Happy New Year guys. Here is another little snippet to start the year off right. Enjoy. x

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**The Chase**

He had a fucking headache. A sharp nagging, pounding fucking headache and it had been hanging around for the last three days. Leon dismissed his class and waited for the clamour to lessen as they filtered out of their rows. The sharp twisting pain in his skull spiked and he winced, pinching the bridge of his nose as if the motion would relieve him of the ice pick he felt was lodged in his brain. He began scooping up his papers, shoving them into his bag, when a gentle and polite cough cut through the dwindling din of the exiting students.

Leon knew immediately who it was.

"Leon?" Cloud asked his tone light and way too friendly.

"It's professor." He replied curtly without looking up. There was a short and awkward silence while the last of the students left until eventually it was just Leon and Cloud, once again alone together and Leon couldn't help but experience that terrifying feeling of vulnerability that always attacked him around the other man – like he couldn't control himself.

"Right, sorry." Cloud cleared his throat and Leon thought his reply was a little sarcastic. It bothered him. "Look, I just wanted to apologise for the other night, in my apartment." Cloud continued and Leon's heart froze. He had yet to look up at the younger man.

"It doesn't matter." The brunet replied a little too quickly.

"No, it does. I think… I may have made a fool of myself. I'm sorry."

Leon quickly lifted his gaze, his eyes flicking over the one person he had been trying to avoid seeing and at once wished that he hadn't. Cloud was fucking amazing. He _looked_ amazing and Leon felt the blood rise in him, heating his cheeks and swelling his groin.

"It's fine." He insisted, cutting his eyes away and hoping to Hyne that his blush wasn't too noticeable.

"No, it's not. I think I went too far. It's just… I don't know. I sort of got the impression that maybe you liked me. I…" Cloud stepped closer and both Leon's heart and his headache peaked. "I crossed the line. I really am sorry."

Leon couldn't have agreed more but for some reason Cloud's apology left him feeling hollow. Aside from his crushing embarrassment, the only thing that Leon could honestly say he felt was empty and he hated it. It wasn't the first time that Leon had thought long and hard about his empty life, yet Cloud's brief albeit lasting impact on it had caused Leon to question something that long years of solitude hadn't even come close to cracking. He realised he was lonely and he no longer relished the idea of his own private space, but the very idea of _wanting_ to share his time with someone was daunting enough, never mind the prospect of involving himself with one of his students.

"I do like you." he found himself saying. "I like you a lot." And as if from somewhere deep in the darkest corners of his unexplored sense of courage, he found himself trying to explain his thoughts to the young man. "I like you too much, Cloud. Do you understand?" Leon looked up again and tried his hardest to hold the blond's surprised stare. To his utter horror, Cloud only smiled.

"I knew it." the younger whispered, that silly grin still on his face only growing wider as Leon's panic increased.

"This isn't a game, Cloud." He warned, meaning his job, Cloud's education, and their reputations.

"Isn't it?"

Leon was stunned to silence. The very prospect of a relationship with one of his students was crazy enough, but the insinuation that it was no more than a bit of fun to the young man was madness itself. Didn't he realise what was on the line?

"You're the one that's been throwing me mixed signals." Cloud elaborated, his whole demeanour far too bold now and Leon didn't like it one bit.

"I… I never…" he tried to defend himself, but he knew as well as Cloud did how guilty he was.

"I don't care what bullshit reason you've got for trying to stay away. I'm not going to stop." Cloud said assertively, stepping those last few inches into Leon's personal space. "I'm not going to stop until you give in because I know you want me."

And really, Leon didn't have much of an argument for that. The surety in the young man's eyes sent a bolt of panic and lust racing down his spine and the only thing that the brunet could rationally think to do was leave. He had to put as much distance between himself and this terrifyingly confident young man as possible. He stepped back, only to freeze when a warm hand curled around his wrist. Cloud tugged a little, drawing the brunet in closer until they were almost nose to nose.

"Admit it." Cloud demanded lowly.

"This isn't right." Leon managed to whisper, his throat achingly tight.

"I don't care, answer me."

"I…" Leon was overcome with a maddening desire to kiss Cloud. He licked his lips, his heart flipping backwards and forwards as he watched Cloud's eyes follow the movement. He could almost feel those eyes caressing the line of his mouth and see the explicit thoughts running behind that fiery gaze. "I want you." it came out almost like a moan.

A small satisfied grin ghosted across Cloud's own lips before he leaned in the rest of the way and brushed his mouth against Leon's. It was barely a kiss, more a mingling of breath and a sinful promise of what was to come as Leon closed his eyes and let the almost sensations wash over him.

"If you want me, you have to come and get me." Cloud whispered before pulling away, letting go of Leon's wrist and he turned to leave.

Leon's shaking breaths only returned to him once Cloud had left and shut the door behind him.


	7. Exchanges

**A/N: **Hello again. I just can't seem to stop writing this story! It is quite literally my every spare thought. In any case, I don't hear much complaining, so we'll carry on. I wanted this to have a bit of a Christmas theme considering the time of year and all, but then I began to wonder if this world would even _have _Christmas – it being a Christian holiday and what not, so I've settled for calling it Solstice, and made it a winter celebration instead.

I hope you enjoy. xxx

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**Exchanges**

Leon had to stifle the sounds Cloud was making with the palm of his hand; his own little moans smothered into the crook of the blond's neck as he bit down on the tender flesh and rocked forwards. The bed creaked under them in that tell tail intone and despite how hard Leon tried to keep his thrusts shallow, the rocking sounded deafening in the quiet of his dorm room. Cloud's breath was hot against his hand, and his skin slick at his hip as Leon gripped harder, kneading the muscle there.

The wall supporting them was cool and smooth against Cloud's forehead and he splayed his hand along it wider, hoping to soak up some of its relief into his scorched flesh. He lazily stroked himself, keeping time with Leon's careful penetration and everything was slow and intense, the air too heavy in the thick hotness of the tiny room.

The young blond had only arrive a short time before, surprising his professor who had been alarmed to say the least at finding his student and secret lover stood outside his room for anyone to see.

"What are you doing here?" he had hissed, stepping out briefly to check up and down the halls to see if anyone was watching.

"I came to give you this." Cloud had replied, holding out a brightly wrapped present.

Leon had looked at it like it might have been a dangerous animal, the seconds ticking away as he tried to gather the shocked and scattered pieces of his mind together to work out what was going on, before he remembered that it was Solstice and everyone had gone home for the holidays. Everyone except himself, and Cloud, apparently.

"Get in here." He demanded, grabbing the front of Cloud's jacket and scarf and pulled him into his room.

Cloud stumbled inside, turning sharply to avoid crashing into Leon's desk that was stacked high with papers and books and caught Leon checking the halls one more time before closing the door.

"Cloud, do you have any idea how risky it is for you to come here?" he asked running a hand raggedly through his hair.

"Relax; everyone's gone home. There's no one about." Cloud said with a small playful smirk. He loosened his scarf and shrugged his way out of his coat, placing it across the back of Leon's swivel chair.

"What do you think you're doing?" the brunet asked him, his face stern and completely unmoved by his lover's appearance.

"Making myself comfortable." Cloud replied, toeing off his boots. He cut off Leon's taciturn reply with a quick assault to his lips, taking the older man by surprise and pushing him back up against the door. Leon only resisted for a fraction of a second, before giving into Cloud's incessant mouth.

"You know, you're really cute when you're trying to be serious." Cloud commented as he wasted little time reaching for Leon's belt.

"I'm not _trying_" Leon replied, caught halfway between wanting Cloud to stop in case someone heard them and begging him to continue. "I _am_ serious." He managed to say before Cloud silenced him again with another dizzying kiss. Despite his bravado, it was really all the persuasion Leon needed and before long he had stripped Cloud of his clothes and tipped him towards the bed.

Regardless of Leon's earlier concerns it clearly hadn't been enough to stop himself from pushing Cloud up against the wall and fucking him slowly, making the breathless and dizzying sensations last for as long as possible.

Leon pushed himself in deeper, shifting his angle and was satisfied when he felt the puff of hot air against his palm and the muffled cry from the blond.

"Shhh." He warned kissing the spot he had bitten earlier, lapping at the sweat that had gathered there. He teased that spot inside his lover a while longer, only relenting once Cloud's legs began to shake so badly they were in danger of collapsing under them. "Are you ready?" he asked, his voice husky.

Cloud whined and nodded, trying to break free from the hand over his mouth but Leon's grip was strong.

"Hold on." Leon instructed him, taking Cloud's erection over from the younger man and leaning all his weight up against the blond's back.

Cloud braced himself against the wall, fists clenched above his head as all of his pleasure was taken over by the older man who began to fuck him harder. He bucked, wanting to push back and participate in his own orgasm, but the older man had him pinned, his constant assault pitching their combined weight against the wall as Cloud was thrust and fucked into white hot blinding release, his whole body bucking and twisting against the uncontrollable pleasure. It wasn't until it was all over that he realised Leon had cum as well and that the juncture of his neck and shoulder was sore from the fierce bite mark imprinted into the skin.

Leon let his hand slip away from Cloud's mouth and the younger man's harsh panting spilled out into the quiet of the room, mingling with his own.

"Fuck." Cloud moaned hoarsely finally able to say_ something_. The weight from his back disappeared and he shuddered as Leon pulled out of him. Finally he pushed off the wall and collapsed backwards onto the narrow bed, uncaring that the old box springs screeched or that Leon threw him another one of those warning looks.

The older man quickly disposed of the condom and stretched out on the bed beside his lover. They hadn't been doing this long, and the intricacies of post-fuck chatter had always been something of a mystery to the older man in any case, however his younger companion seemed unaffected with the same problem.

"You've no idea how badly I needed that." He breathed out, turning to flop onto his stomach.

Leon snorted, thinking that yes, he knew exactly. He probably had the record for longest dry spell on campus after all. In fact, it could more accurately be described as a drought. He was the proverbial walking desert.

"Don't tell me that's all you came to see me for. You'll hurt my feelings." He replied dryly.

"Huh? Oh yeah. I forgot." Cloud suddenly exclaimed, climbing off the too soft bed and scrabbling through his discarded clothes for the present he had brought over. Normally Leon would have been exhausted. The young man's exuberance would have exasperated the more introverted older man yet somehow he felt none of that. Instead, he felt… invigorated – excited even. Leon didn't allow himself too much time to dwell on those thoughts.

Cloud clambered back onto the bed and settled down again next to Leon, handing over the gift, all of a sudden a little shyer than he had been.

"Here." He said an edge of vulnerability to his voice.

Leon took the present and sat himself up, leaning against the headboard. He ripped open the delicate orange crape paper to expose a box. Inside, sat amongst more finely layered paper was a beautiful leather bound journal, its texture butter soft and in the corner his initials were monogramed into the cover. For a long time, Leon was speechless and Cloud worried that he had chosen wrong.

"Do you like it?" he asked eventually, unable to take the silence any longer.

"I…I don't…" Leon was unsure exactly how he felt, but he knew that the last thing he wanted Cloud to feel was that he didn't like it. He loved it. It was, without doubt the nicest thing anybody had ever bought him. It wasn't saying much, considering he didn't receive very many presents, but still, Leon couldn't remember a gift that had made him feel quite like this before. "This must have cost you a fortune." He settled for concerning himself with the monetary value, territory that was much more comfortable, and tried to ignore the way Cloud's expectant face fell ever so slightly.

"Yeah, well, I don't have any family to buy for. Just Tifa and a few others." The young man's awkwardness was palpable.

"I don't know what to say." Leon said honestly.

"Ummm, just say thank you." Cloud tried to joke, but all the while feeling like the sentiment of the gift had missed its mark.

"Thank you." Leon offered as sincerely as he could muster, his eyes locking with Cloud's who still looked so unsure. "Really, thank you." he added, wanting that look to disappear.

"So I should probably get going." Cloud spoke up after a few long moments of uncomfortable silence.

"Do you have to?" Leon found himself saying.

"Um, yeah. Sorry." Cloud rose from the bed and began dressing, all the while feeling the eyes of his professor on his skin.

He left the same way he had come in, quietly and as inconspicuously as possible; the feel and scent of Leon still clinging to his skin wrapped up and embedded into the material of his clothes.


	8. Beginnings

**A/N: **This scene has been planned for a very long time and I'm super thrilled I can finally post it. Enjoy. xxx

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**Beginnings**

He had travelled to Seventh Heaven to set Cloud straight; driving the ten minute ride with his head full of the things he knew he had to say in order to keep his student at arm's length and his determination, his resolve, had been fast right up until the moment he had set his eyes on the young blond man. In that instant he knew, without a shadow of a doubt – watching him in his thin cotton tee, a hand towel casually thrown over his shoulder as he cleared away the bar top – that he would leave this place as Cloud's lover.

He had given himself a million and one reasons why it couldn't happen. He had told himself a thousand times that it mustn't. However all of those reasons and hours melted to nothing worth a damn as Cloud turned to him and saw the inevitability written all over the taller man's face. Cloud gave him a crooked half smile, his eyes sparking with triumph and wickedness and he set the glasses down on the bar and flipped the towel off his shoulder, bunching it up between his hands as he let his eyes wonder the length of Leon's body, openly staring at him and the brunet felt himself shiver.

In that moment Leon gave up. He had promised himself a lot of things since setting eyes on Cloud Strife and had so far failed to keep a single one of them. Hadn't he promised himself that he would not think about Cloud? Hadn't he promised himself that despite thinking about Cloud he would not fantasise about him? Hadn't he promised himself that despite fantasising about him he would not admit that he wanted him? And after all of that, hadn't he promised himself – despite thinking and fantasising and wanting – that he would not give in?

Feeling all too well the disturbing flood of failure, he surrendered himself to the most frightening prospect he could possibly imagine: the unknown, with only the illusion of control as a safety net to catch him if he fell.

That pull, the one that he had been unable to tear himself away from only grew stronger the closer Cloud got to him, until it was so strong he felt himself physically tipping forwards as if his centre of gravity had somehow shifted and he now revolved around the younger man, his feet no longer planted to the ground, the sun no longer his anchor.

"You win." He said in a rush, wanting it all to be over. He was so tired of fighting it he hadn't even realised how much effort it had taken. Cloud just smiled that confident little smirk and it drove Leon mad. How could he be so calm, so in control? Didn't he feel this ridiculous shifting of the earth too?

"Took you long enough." Cloud commented his eyebrow cocked in mockery.

Leon just huffed in defeat, unable to muster up so much as a sardonic smile as he surrendered to that one thing he'd told himself he'd never do. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to feel regret. In truth he didn't really know how he felt; only confused and scared and yet somehow more sure of anything than he'd been his whole life. This was something he knew he wanted. It was possibly the only thing he had ever wanted this badly and for once he was going to allow himself to have it.

"No one can know." He said simply, his eyes open and honest and serious. They set Cloud's skin alight.

The younger man nodded his agreement, unable to tear his gaze away from Leon's eyes and the way the grey and blues swirled together, conveying his emotions through the notes of shifting ice; the storm that raged in those eyes a perfect counter-balance to the older man's outward demeanour. Those eyes held so many secrets.

"Follow me." Cloud said his voice somewhat smaller and less sure of itself than it had been. He jerked his head subtly to the left, indicating over his shoulder and Leon followed the younger man, paying little attention to anything else as they crossed behind the bar and through the service entrance into the back where Leon remembered the curling flight of stairs to be.

"Yuffie, watch the bar." Cloud said in passing to a young girl as she emerged from the cellar. Leon hardly noticed the befuddled gawp the girl gave them before rolling her eyes and huffing exasperatedly.

They climbed the stairs smoothly; the anticipation and tension rising with each step and Leon felt – possibly for the first time in years – those first stirrings of anticipated lust. There was no mistaking what they were climbing these stairs for. Leon found himself staring at Cloud's ass, the sight unavoidable as the young man led the way and it was only broken when the blond looked back over his shoulder, reaching out his hand to Leon who took it without question and allowed the younger man to lead him up the last flight of creaking wooden steps and into Cloud's apartment.

In the blink of an eye, all of those long weeks and months spend denying himself – holding himself back – were over as Cloud stepped in close to Leon and took the first kiss. It was comical really, how fast it happened; for all of those nights spent thinking of this moment and for all of the other ones that would come after it, and they couldn't even make it to the bed. As clothes came off in between frantic, possessive kisses, they stumbled awkwardly without thinking, crashing against bookcases and walls before falling over the dining table. It was how Leon found himself buried deep inside his new lover for the first time, Cloud's spine pressed to Leon's stomach as the brunet's hips snapped an agitated pace, his harsh grunts filling the lofty space and he thought to himself, if he could keep it like this – harsh and raw and _impersonal_, Cloud facing away from him and those eyes safely hidden from view – he might be able to survive this.

He reached out, wrapping a hand around the back of Cloud's neck and pressed down, as if to assert this private thought and convince himself that it could ever work. With the new leverage he fucked Cloud harder, his chest near exploding when the blond let out a series of harsh, unstable cries, his knuckles turning white as he gripped the edges of the table harder.

Leon held off as long as he could, wanting Cloud to cum first before falling into his own orgasm and it came on them both quickly. Somehow, somewhere along the line they had both known that their first time together would not take long but the brunet couldn't help but feel that it had ended far too soon. Still, Leon knew that even hours with this man would not be enough. His rutting slowed and then stilled, his shoulders slumping and his head fell forward, chin resting heavily on his chest as his hands worked the flesh of Cloud's slick hips.

The blond was breathing hard, his forehead pressed to the cool metal of his dining table which fogged up with his hot breath, roughly expelled in short sharp pants. His hands slipped along the edges looking for purchase and he tried to pull himself further onto the table, afraid that his quivering legs wouldn't be able to hold him once the solid weight of the brunet disappeared. Leon bent forward, pressing his front up against Cloud's back and ran his hands out along Cloud's arms, his fingers finding Cloud's and curling around them as he kissed the back of the blond's neck. The older man pulled out, wrapping their arms around the slim young man and pulled Cloud up to stand on shaking legs.

As quickly as it had started, it was over. They dressed, throwing each other side long glances and small playful smirks as laces were fastened and zippers slid back into place.

Leon left out the side entrance, his head and his heart still for the first time in months and he drew in a large equilibrating breath. He climbed into his car, the smell of Cloud still clinging to his skin and he allowed himself a small smile as he thought of the last words the blond had whispered against his lips as they'd parted.

"That was fun." Leon had said, hand on the push bar that opened the drayman's door. Cloud smiled that crooked grin, his demeanour once again confident and assertive. He leaned in; ghosting his lips against Leon's and lightly kissed the older man's top lip, warming the skin there with his breath.

"_That_ was only the beginning."


	9. Nightcall

**A/N: **Drunken confessions. I've made more than a few in my time. Enjoy. Xxx

* * *

**Nightcall**

"What the hell do you mean 'you just can't'?"

"I mean I can't do this anymore, Cloud."

"That's bullshit."

"You have to stay away."

"And what if I don't want to? What if I don't want this to be over?"

"You don't have a choice."

"Don't I?"

"No, Cloud. This isn't like before. It's not a game anymore."

"You're fucking right it's not. I lo-"

"Don't say it. Don't even fucking say it."

"…"

Cloud could feel the bass of the music through his chest. It beat so loudly to drown out everything else that he didn't hear the stranger come up behind him. The tequila that he had been drowning himself in was strong and he barely noticed when the stranger tapped him on the shoulder, leaning in real close and yelled into his ear above the din of the club. He didn't catch it the first time, making that face and the gesture with his hand against his ear that signals to everybody in the known universe that he didn't hear him. The stranger bent down again and offered to buy him a drink. Cloud thought that was a very good idea indeed. A few more shots and Cloud knew he wouldn't even care that this guy was totally not his type or that his hair was the wrong colour or that he wasn't even that good looking. He accepted the drink the tall guy offered him and threw it back, finally feeling that woolly-headed buzz that told him he was one more drink away from a bad night.

He wasn't a dancer. He hated to dance really, so he supposed the only thing left to do was cut out the middle man and get right to it. He took the stranger by the hand and led him away from the bar, an alcove or shadowed spot would do just nicely and he allowed himself to be pushed up against the wall. It was a relief not to have to spell it out to this guy who seemed to know exactly where this was headed, who took the lead, relieving Cloud of any decisions. He allowed himself to be devoured; trying very hard not to focus on the way the mouth against his felt all wrong and the taste… it wasn't the same. He absently pondered about the idea that alcohol was supposed to get you so shitfaced you forgot these little details, before realising that like a lot of things, alcohol was selective. You couldn't choose which parts of your mind it obliterated and Cloud thought that was a really big shame. The guy's hands were wondering and Cloud thought that was just fine. The feel of them kinda felt nice, almost like… and then he screwed his eyes shut and gripped a little harder into the hair that was too short. He wasn't supposed to be thinking like that. This was the whole point after all.

Suddenly the tall guy was gone, his mouth, his hands were wrenched away as a hand landed on Cloud's shoulder and the blur of images caught up with his drunk mind and he registered Leon. The tall guy was pissed, his shoulders thrown back in aggression and his hands held out to the sides in a 'what the fuck' gesture but Leon just threw him a look before turning to Cloud, his hand still on his shoulder only his fingers where digging in now.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing Strife?"

Cloud could have laughed it was so fucking comical. So cliché. This was so fucking rich it was unbelievable.

"Whatever the fuck I like. It's nothing to do with you anymore, is it, _professor._" He spat the word, hoping it would find its mark. One careful look told him it had. Only just like always, Leon didn't need words to convey what he meant. He yanked Cloud by the collar of his shirt, dragging him past the tall guy who looked more confused than angry now and through the press and grind of the club, the young blond drunkenly bouncing off people in his wake.

They stumbled outside, the tall brunet only stopping once they were down the side alley and secreted away behind a dumpster. Cliché after cliché, Cloud thought.

"You wanna tell me what all that was about?" Leon asked him in that 'teacher' way he sometimes did that just drove Cloud bananas.

"You said it was over." Cloud hissed back, trying to keep his mind on the conversation and not on how much he fucking wanted this man despite the situation.

"You didn't waste any time."

It was a silly and petty point and to a more coherent and sober Cloud it probably would have revealed a lot about the older man, however the blond was in no state to read between the lines.

"I don't believe it's any of your fuckin' business anymore." He snarled, rocking back against the wall, his balance shot to shit. "This thing between us, whatever it was, is gone now. You said you didn't want it. Well that's fine by me; I got plenty of other options to keep me amused."

"And that's all this fucking is to you, isn't it? A fucking game? You want to be kept amused." Leon finally snapped, his voice snippish and low and deadly. His palm had somehow found its way around Cloud's neck, the pads of his fingers pressed against the flesh of Cloud's face.

"A game?" Cloud was almost on the verge of laughing. "You think I'm playing a game? I fucking _love _you." he yelled, pushing the older man away and breaking that hold from around his throat.

Leon was trying to remain angry, Cloud could see it in his eyes as the fire died down and the façade cracked and little by little the seams pulled wider apart until there was nothing left on the man's face but defeat.

"You had to fucking say it, didn't you?" Leon's voice was low and exasperated and Cloud read that all the wrong way. He pushed up from the wall and nudged his way past Leon, shoulder knocking against the older man's.

"Whatever, just… leave me alone." He grunted dejectedly, not expecting the hand that reached out and gripped his wrist.

Leon pulled him back, taking advantage of Cloud's drunken state and confusion and pushed him back up the wall. He kissed him, silencing the question and surprise that had been on the younger man's lips, pressing his whole body up against Cloud's as if they hadn't only been apart for just longer than a week. When Leon pulled away, they were both panting heavily and Cloud's eyes were filled with a confusion he'd never seen before. There was so much hurt in them, Leon almost had to look away.

"I thought you said you couldn't do this?" the blond asked, emotion clear in his voice. He was choked up and on the brink of letting it all go. He couldn't do it a second time.

"Sometimes, we say things we don't mean." Leon explained, hoping it would be enough. He had no idea what he was doing and he'd hoped that was obvious enough without him having to admit to it. He hadn't planned on any of this happening and yet, he'd found himself the centre of the biggest fuck up in his life. He was a passive introvert for Hyne's sake, how did things like this keep happening to him?

"You're an asshole." Cloud bit off.

"There, perfect example." Leon pointed out, hoping to lighten the mood.

"Oh no, I meant that."

Despite themselves, despite the mood, they both smiled a little.

Leon reached up a hand and brushed back the bangs that had skittered in front of Cloud's eyes and caught in his lashes, carding his fingers through the hair at Cloud's temple. It had only been a week, but fuck, he'd missed him.

"I'm sorry." He confessed, more meaning in his eyes than he'd ever been comfortable expressing.

Cloud's heart was still beating heavily and he was still angry, but he calmed himself and schooled his features. This was exactly what he'd wanted after all. He covered the hand that rested against his cheek with his own palm and curled his fingers into Leon's. He let his eyes soften and the last shards of ice fall from his expression and leaned in and kissed the older man. When he pulled away, his expression was so tired, so weary that Leon felt guilty all over again.

"Let's get out of here." The brunet said, pulling his younger lover away from the wall.

Cloud followed him on drunken legs and slumped into the passenger side seat of Leon's car, falling asleep almost as soon the engine was turned over.


	10. The Deal

**A/N: **I consider this chapter the 'turning point' in this little arc and the music to accompany it was chosen specifically to echo this fact. Although I consider Placebo to be in the same category as Linkin Park and the like, and would never normally recommend this band to anyone above the age of 16 or at least in the very late stages of puberty, I never-the-less felt Kate Bush's version lacked the right dynamics. For me, the very fact that this is the only song of theirs that I like, and that I think has any serious musical credibility – not to mention the fact it was written by another person – speaks volumes. That being said, it is a great song and a great cover. Please go listen.

Most importantly, enjoy. xxx

* * *

'You don't want to hurt me,

But see how deep the bullet lies.

Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.

There's a thunder in our hearts, baby.

So much hate for the ones we love?

Tell me we both matter, don't we?

#

You,

(be running up that hill)

You and me,

(be running up that hill)

You and me won't be unhappy.

#

And if I only could,

Make a deal with God,

And get him to swap our places.'

* * *

**The Deal**

Everything about the way that Leon was kissing him was familiar and although intolerably sweet and fierce it wasn't what Cloud was looking for. They had done this. They had been here. Their routine, although both safe and clandestine in nature, was wearing thin and Cloud was impatient to shift the tide. Their game of push and pull, power and submission, was becoming transparent and the blond wondered how long they could continue this maddening game of aversion. He wondered how much longer Leon could keep it up and he knew, deep in his heart that the taller man would never be the one to make the first move. That wasn't the way they worked. It never had been.

He let the older man turn them, let the man's subtly larger body drive them back towards the bed. He was happy to let the man think he was in control of this thing; this thing that Cloud had started and under which the younger man had no illusions.

Just as desperately and hurriedly as their first time, clothes came off; impatient hands tugging at belts and zippers, yanking on sleeves and hems of shirts until they were naked, pressed up against each other and just waiting for the moment Leon would push them down and they would hear the screech of the bedsprings and the obscene rhythm it would count.

There was a subtle strength in Cloud's hands tonight, a restrained and powerful ripple of force that Leon was far too preoccupied to notice. Months and months of the same habitual fucking had taken its advantage and now Leon was blind to the things the younger wanted – needed. As they crashed to the mattress Cloud turned them, his strong shoulders flexing, broad back arching against the inevitable jerk of surprise and Leon only struggled more, confusion bleeding across his handsome face because Cloud was pinning him – wouldn't let him up.

"Cloud, what are you-"

The younger kissed him, wrapping strong, unbreakable fingers around deceptively delicate wrists and pushed them to the mattress, his hips pressing the same way. There was a fight – as close to a physical confrontation as either of them had come – and Cloud refused to retreat. He was amused, in his own way. In the classroom, during their normal day to day lives there was no question of who was superior. Leon had always beaten him hands down. He was his professor – his mentor – and intellectual senior. However, like this, Cloud would always be stronger. When it came to games and fucking and pure physical strength, Cloud would always win and Leon was only just beginning to understand how little control he had ever had.

Cloud's left hand went slack, letting go of his biting grip on Leon's wrist and cupped the older man's face. Leon took his chance, placing a large hand against Cloud's shoulder and tried to push; wanting to flip them, wanting to regain that familiar equilibrium but Cloud's body weight would not shift. That hand on his face only shifted up into his auburn hair and pulled slightly, tugging a few strands behind his ear as Cloud finished devastating his mouth.

"Cloud, what-"

The younger pierced him with a blistering look, the pad of his thumb rough and firm against Leon's cheek as the older man's struggles slowed.

"Just… trust me." A demand, as heated and ardent as the look in the younger's eye.

Leon's hand slipped from Cloud's shoulder. His confusion was evident in his eyes and his trepidation was just as obvious but he relented. He was on the edge of panic. This wasn't their deal and it never had been. These were not the rules of the game and it was sickening how easily Cloud had altered them. He was adrift in a sea of wanting Cloud and too fucking horny to stop but his mind was screaming at him. This wasn't right, this would end badly.

Trust Cloud? He knew deep down in his lonely soul that he already did and there was nothing more frightening than that thought.

He let Cloud fuck him, and although he fought it and tried at every turn to tell Cloud how wrong this was, how much he didn't want it, he let it happen anyway. He watched the way Cloud's face changed, he watched how his eyes grew dark and his brows drew together, he watched the beautiful contours of his face shift from playful to pleasure soaked and he watched as he came, aware that he'd never done this in all the months they'd been fucking and it terrified him. It terrified him because he knew now that he'd seen it he'd want it again and again and that just _couldn't_ happen.

Leon looked down and was surprised to find that he had reached orgasm, the thrilling sensation only a vague and passing memory in the terrifying moments that had just transpired. His head ached and his throat was dry and his chest felt crushed by something weighty and immovable. He found it hard to breathe. Feeling was coming back to him and he found himself clinging desperately, his fingers flexing against the soft flesh of Cloud's back and the young man, still buried in him, only shifted subtly; rolling his hips to tease the last of their pleasure before his body went slack and he pressed his forehead to the older man's. It was far too intimate, far too tender.

Without stopping, without thinking, he placed his strong grip around Cloud's biceps and moved him, pushing back until he was able to sit up, releasing himself now that Cloud wasn't fighting against him.

Cloud fell unceremoniously to the side, his expression shifting from exhilarated to pissed as he watched his older lover stand and dress, Leon's own face unreadable.

"Leon, what's the matter?"

"Nothing. I have to leave."

His answer was too clipped, too severe and Cloud didn't buy a word of it.

"So soon? That's a bit rude even for you, don't you think?"

"I'm sorry. I have to go."

Leon left and Cloud sat confused, all the while knowing deep down that he had pushed too hard and demanded too much too soon. A part of him wanted to think fuck-it-all and be done with the whole thing, but he had known more than a few weeks ago that he was in far too deep to even consider bailing. He stood, balling his fists in his hair and tried to work through the rage that seemed to swell and expand outwards further and further until he passed his desk and swept everything from the top of it, a short sharp 'fuck!' screamed into the emptiness of his apartment.

He resolved himself – whilst picking up the pieces of the shattered mug that had crashed to the floor in his moment of unchecked rage – that he would harden himself. And the next time that he saw Leon, he would be prepared. He would be prepared for anything.


End file.
